Deareast Ryan,
Since this is a 'love letter' a la Robin Sneed. I am not often lost for words, but this is one time when I feel somewhat awkward. Hello Ryan. I always had a kind of a crush on you. A little crush that grew into something more. This was hardly a secret, since my friends were well aware of it.
As the days goes by I felt something strange as I look into your face my heart beats are not the same. Your gorgeous face I do see before me. That huge, beaming smile that made everyone else want to smile too. You make me smile like crazy. Whenever I see you, even for a few seconds, it brightens up even my worst days. You sound so perfect, everything about you makes me want you even more than I already did. Everyday that goes by I feel myself just falling for you. I couldn’t stop thinking that all night. Sometimes I wish we were in different places in our lives and I think about how we could be together in a perfect world.
Last night I felt sick. I could feel my heart break, just tearing up into two pieces. I wanted to cry. Pining over you from afar. Not seeing you is the worst part of the summer.
"Sana tayo na lang." Days like today make me think that it will never happen. No matter how much I wish for it to be like that. It sucks you know? It really does killing me on the inside and knowing that I can’t do anything about it is hurting me so much. I know I might not be the most prettiest girl, I might not have the perfect smile, or the most skinniest body, but I know I do have a perfect heart that will always love you through everything no matter what.
My admiration for you was the first of many secret crushes, loves that lived only in the margins of notebooks, in doodles and daydreams, in imaginary plans and playlists.
You have no idea, you have no clue just how much I think about you. I try not to stare, I try not to hide, I try not to show that I have always lied.
I have so much to say, I would love to say it all today. But I cant, for a certain reason, to my heart, that would be a total treason. Wanting to protect my heart from unnecessary bruises and cuts and it could backfire and ruin my friendship with you. So I keep it down inside my heart. I long to tell you, these many things. Maybe I will someday, and we will see what it brings.
Before I bid farewell for now, I wish to share with you a song which I sing in my heart to you.
